Nicaragua: Managua, León, Playa Jiquilillo

Right, so: there was a German surfer chick and she convinced me to go straight from Cobán, Guatemala to a beach in Nicaragua.

Well, not quite.

I had to go through three capitals to get there: Guatemala City, San Salvador and Managua.  And here's the thing about Central American capital cities: they are uniformly terrible.  The rest of the countryside might be wonderful: safe, interesting, welcoming, cheap.  But the moment you get to the city it's like you've wandered onto a post-apocalyptic movie set.  But real, all too real.

The night I spent in Guatemala City (missed the bus by a goddamn hour) was in an hourly joint whose only saving grace was that it was walking distance from the bus terminal.  I threw the deadbolt and didn't leave until morning.  In Managua I asked the hospedaje owner how to get to the nearest ATM.  She considered for a moment then told me that I couldn't go to the nearest ATM because I'd be robbed.  And while giving me directions to a further, safer ATM, she was very specific that I not go directly there (through a barrio), but rather go first to the main avenue and thence to the ATM.  Otherwise I'd get robbed.  "Seriously?" I asked her.  "It's 11 in the morning!"  Her deadpan response: "Sí."

I managed to make it out of Managua without incident, though, headed for León.  I'd heard reports of German surfer chicks there.  Didn't know where to find any, though, so I figured I might as well take in a few sights.

León is a colonial city, so your options are fairly limited: churches, churches or churches.

For whatever reason, they seemed to be particularly into the whole suffering thing.  Because isn't that what we all look for in our places of worship?  Life size depictions of torture?  I know I do.

They even had a pair of thieves to keep ole J.C. company.  Look at his arm.  Ouch.

The main cathedral was somewhat more understated.

I mean, still into the suffering, but they didn't hit you in the face with it.  Made it kinda arty instead (this is only one station of the cross; the other 13 were similarly graphic).

Hey, that's pretty cool.  And no blood or guts!

This was the best part, though: the contrast between the interior and exterior.  Seriously: this decrepit pile is the main cathedral.

And of course, this being León...

Less scary, more regal.

I stayed at this funky family run hostel with a kind of garret at the back that looked down on the main courtyard.  The afternoon rainstorms were outrageous.  Biblical, even.

Then, after a few days, fate intervened once again.  While I was sitting in the internet cafe, who should walk in but a certain German surfer chick?  She'd been staying at a beach, way out in hell-and-gone where there was no internet (which is why I hadn't heard from her).  But there she was, so the next day we headed out to a beach at the end of the road.

There really is almost nothing in Playa Jiquilillo, Nicaragua.  The only hostel is so young that you still have to duck the palm fronds.  Pretty nice driveway though, eh?

Cabañas, sand floors in the dorm and.. what's under that big palapa at the end?

Oh, it's a bar.  With hammocks.  That makes sense.

And beyond the bar?

The beach.

It was a pretty nice beach, and certainly empty.

Unfortunately, the surf was pretty indifferent: weak, mixed up and frequently blown out.  And the selection of rental boards left much to be desired.  Also, I wasn't in the best shape.  That's alright though.  I can lay around in hammocks, drinking and reading with the best of 'em.  But.  After only a couple of days a certain German surfer chick sat me down and informed me that "we wouldn't travel well together."

Wait, wtf?

Did I miss something?  Was this whole thing my idea?  Or was it her that damn near demanded that I follow her down there?  Did we leave logic behind in Guatemala?  Didn't matter, though.  It never does.  I was being "travel broken up" with, without even having enjoyed the benefits that typically come first.  I could have sworn fate was on my side, but I guess sometimes fate's a tease.  And off she went.

Women.